Just like last year, The Optimist takes you through every first-round match-up and provides fearless expert analysis and predictions. This year, though, we'll be splitting it into two more manageable parts--Thursday's games, and Friday's games. Here're Thursday's games.
East Region
(1) Syracuse vs. (16) UNC-Ashville: One of the UNC satellite campuses always seems to sneak into the tournament by winning the Poopsville Valley Conference. They probably sign one recruit a year who thinks he is going to be a Tar Heel and forgets to read the fine print and then fill out the team with walk-ons. Syracuse without Fab Melo is not going to win the tournament. But they can beat UNC-Asvhille. Syracuse 93, UNC-Ashville 65.
(2) Ohio State vs. (15) Loyola Maryland: Loyola took the MAAC automatic bid that Iona deserved through that most unnecessary of college basketball institutions, the conference tournament. The "Greyhounds," as they are known to their four fans, came within a surprising 24 points of Kentucky earlier this year. If they are lucky, they might make a pass at that same margin of defeat against Ohio State. Ohio State 86, Loyola Maryland 61
(4) Wisconsin vs. (13) Montana: Ah, yes, the ol' Wisconsin-Montana state rivalry that dates all the way back to five days ago when the brackets were announced. Bragging rights for best public school named after a state on the Canadian border are up for grabs in a first-round match-up with all the appeal of molding Wisconsin cheddar or [a bad version of whatever Montana produces, which as far as I know is nothing]. Wisconsin 63, Montana 55
(5) Vanderbilt vs. (12) Harvard: Two respected academic institutions (one more so than the other) face off in the mandatory annual "two decent schools play each other in the NCAA tournament and provide endless fodder for the announcers to discuss how smart the athletes must be" game. Harvard got some early publicity and cracked the Top 25 at one point in the season's early-going, but a rough trip through the Ivy League schedule is not a good sign. Vanderbilt 75, Harvard 60
(7) Gonzaga vs. (10) West Virginia: There has been an awful lot of grumbling about West Virginia having to travel about two minutes to get to the site of this game while Gonzaga has to fly across the country, but then again these teams are playing for the right to get embarrassed by Ohio State in two days so who cares. That said, home field advantage is statistically proven to be huge in the tournament. West Virginia 77, Gonzaga 70
(8) Kansas State vs. (9) Southern Miss: The 8-9 games are usually pick-'ems, but in this bracket everything is breaking K-State's way, including a generously seeded first-round opponent and a potential second-round opponent that just lost one of its starters to an eligibility issue. Also, coach Frank Martin looks like the kind of guy who probably has an in with the mob and can pull the strings required to ensure a victory. Kansas State 71, Southern Miss 63
South Region
(1) Kentucky vs. (16) Western Kentucky: Western Kentucky had their fun in the play-in game (I steadfastly refuse to acknowledge the "First Four" as a round unto itself). Now their in-state brethren can have their own fun by mercilessly kicking the crap out of Western Kentucky. On the plus side, we all get to see WKU's big fun mascot dance around for 40 more minutes of basketball! Kentucky 97, Western Kentucky 54
(3) Baylor vs. (14) South Dakota State: The Jackrabbits are surprisingly decent (they pounded the Washington "we totally should have made the tournament" Huskies in Seattle), but not a match for Baylor's wide assortment of talent. If that weren't enough, Baylor, as the country's premier Methodist institution of higher learning, has God behind it. And we all know how well that worked out for Tebow. Baylor 82, South Dakota State 70
(4) Indiana vs. (13) New Mexico State: What is with all these [fill in second- or third-tier state here] State Universities taking up spots in the tournament? South Dakota, New Mexico, Colorado... the list goes on forever (actually it ends there, but who's really fact-checking this post?). Indiana, meanwhile, will take its media-friendly background story to at least the round of 32. Indiana 75, New Mexico State 64
(5) Wichita State vs. (12) VCU: A disproportionate number of people will most likely end up selecting VCU to go deep into March on the basis of their success last year. Unfortunately, they aren't great and have run into everyone's favorite March darling, the Shockers themselves. And if that isn't a mascot that puts the fear straight into VCU's hearts, I don't know what will. Wichita State 81, VCU 69
(6) UNLV vs. (11) Colorado: Please accept my assurances as a Stanford fan that Colorado is as bad as their two 20-point losses to the Cardinal would indicate. I really don't know what goes on in the games Colorado wins over more challenging opponents like Cal and Arizona, but it probably involves bribery of officials. UNLV walked into a beautiful first round draw. UNLV 87, Colorado 63
(8) Iowa State vs. (9) UConn: The selection committee tapped Iowa State to be the ones to put UConn out of its season of nightmarish misery, but frankly South Dakota State probably could have done the job. UConn's 33 games of mediocrity have been less disappointing than only preseason top 10 and Optimist national champion prediction Pitt winning about three games in an immensely regrettable campaign. Yeesh. Iowa State 73, UConn 65
West Region
(3) Marquette vs. (14) BYU: BYU charges a lot for tuition, most of which goes to the Mormon church, which in part used it for funding the passage of Prop 8. So I don't care much for their chances. Marquette, on the other hand, employs your boy former senator Russ Feingold, who almost certainly could get a better job but whatever more power to him. Go Golden Eagles! Marquette 75, BYU 61
(4) Louisville vs. (13) Davidson: Remember when Steph Curry went to Davidson and they were actually good and people actually thought for two seconds before selecting Louisville in a game like this? Those were fun times. Now Davidson is just that team from who-knows-which Carolina that made the tournament as a result of the Southern Conference having to send someone for gosh sakes. Louisville 72, Davidson 61
(5) New Mexico vs. (12) Long Beach State: There are a number of cool factors on both sides of the court here. New Mexico's nickname is the Lobos. Long Beach State's star is named Casper. New Mexico plays in The Pit, which is below ground level. Long Beach State was one win away from an undefeated season in the Big West. It's a wash. But we have to find a Cinderella somewhere here. Long Beach State 68, New Mexico 65
(6) Murray State vs. (11) Colorado State: After all the undefeated season hype, Murray State just kind of gave out in a wimpy loss to none other than Tennessee State. That loss doesn't really change the outlook for the Racers, which is that of a very solid team with a very solid ceiling and a very solid chance of beating Colorado State because Colorado State is the kind of team that Murray State has a very solid chance of beating. Ladies and gentlemen, I am the future Dick Vitale. Murray State 65, Colorado State 59
Please enjoy the first day of March Madness responsibly by not bragging when the 14-over-3 upset you picked randomly out of a hat comes true and abstaining from looking over my shoulder when I am minding my own business and watching games on my phone. Instead of doing such things, take the twenty seconds required to become a follower. Thanks for reading as always, and check back tomorrow night for part two.
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